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Boston, Massachusetts, United States
Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be. Shel Silverstein

Monday, January 10, 2011

Do you love me?

John 21:15-19
When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?”

“Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”

Again Jesus said, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”

He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.”

The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”

Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Feed my sheep. Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, “Follow me!”

This passage has been heavy on my heart for about a week now. I have betrayed Jesus, as we all have, through sin just as Peter betrayed Jesus. I will continue to betray Jesus for the rest of my life through sin, simply because I am human. I have wanted to badly to prove my love to Jesus through praise, prayer, study, and teaching. Although Christ is more than deserving of those things, I still feel a hole in my heart, a space where Jesus isn't close enough, a space where my sin still separates me from Him. I have been so desperate to get closer to Him and I was so blind to not see how clearly He asked us to show our love for Him.

He's asking, "Taelor, do you love me?" and I am answering "Yes, I am reading your word!" and He is saying "that's great, Taelor, but feed my lambs."
But somehow I missed that part.
He's asking again, "Taelor, do you love me?" and I say "Yes, I am praising You with open arms during worship!" and He is saying again, "that's awesome, Taelor, but take care of my sheep."
I missed the point again.
So, He asks again, never giving up on me, "Taelor, do you truly love me?" and this time I am truly hurt because I feel like I am honestly exhausting myself week by week doing things to show my love for Him, and I answer "Of course I love you, Lord, I am devoting so much time to teaching others how to follow you!"
And here comes the kicker... His answer is "Taelor, that's wonderful, but I also want YOU to follow me."

And now I understand.

Am I ready to follow Jesus? To really, truly, honestly follow Him? Frankly, if I think I am ready or not doesn't matter. Jesus is ready, so I have no choice.

"And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters,[a] you were doing it to me!"
“And he will answer, ‘I tell you the truth, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help me."

Matthew 25:40,45

Over and Out

1 comment:

salfor said...

Very touching and profound lesson, Bug. You are an amazing witness for Him, keep up the good work.